The Heart Of The Matter

Love can be dangerous
It can be hurtful and cruel.

And because my desire is bold
It’s also prideful and overbearing.

Love can make you cry,
And feel tormented
Like you’ve never been before.

Love can make you happy
Make you smile,
As wide as the universe.

But is that enough,
For youto wantto hold on,
Or is the pain I’m inflicting,
Too much for you to bare?

Concept By: Missy © 2020 (edited by: ElRoyPoet)

Please click on photo to play video

The Biggest Mistakes People Make When Choosing a Life Partner | Jordan Peterson

Commentary: All is not fair in love and war; we all need somebody to love; but if the object of your affection—is no longer willing, to be lovable, you cannot say, that she broke your heart; because in essence, she’s not responsible for your heart breaking. You cannot compel her to be lovable, if she doesn’t want to anymore.
If she leads you on—into believing, that she’s willing to be lovable and since your heart needs somebody to love; obviously, you will convince yourself, that she is the one—worthy of your esteem. Consequently, your heart latches on and won’t let go, because it’s a hopeless romantic.
However, if she eventually dejects you, your heart is obliged to break the bond or attachment, in order to move on and rebuild itself. But, like everything else, it’s easier said than done and it could take a lifetime to reconstruct the heart, especially if you’re unwilling to forgive; because you believe in your heart of hearts that you were tricked and are justified in punishing yourself, by hating your old object of our affection.

“In every encounter, we either give life or we drain it; there is no neutral exchange.” By: Brennan Manning

“In a paper published in the journal Qualitative Health Research, Oliffe and colleagues examine how men process breakups and what leads them to seek help for any negative emotional consequences […] His team interviewed 47 men who had experienced a separation, divorce, or breakup. The duration of the relationships described ranged from 4 months to 28 years; 49 percent of the break-ups were partner initiated. Nearly half of the group shared that they’ve experienced suicidal thoughts; more than half experienced mild to severe depression. They shared how they felt after their relationship ended and their strategies for moving on.
Certain themes emerged, namely, that the men most able to experience a positive, personal transformation after the breakup were those who sought to understand their experience, learn from the pain, and change the negative behavior they brought to the relationship.
This suggests that narrative therapy could be especially helpful for people looking to cope with a breakup, Oliffe says. This type of therapy connects to the idea that people use their life stories as tools for meaning-making and helps people deconstruct their problematic narratives. The goal is to move toward healthier story-lines and accept that what’s true for one person may not be true for another.” Excerpt from Why the Antidote to Heartbreak May Lie in the Power of Stories

“Beware of those who weep with realization, for they have realized nothing.” By: Carlos Casteñeda

“People suffering from chronic loneliness are not irretrievably locked into those feelings by nature and nurture. Studies show that cognitive therapies can be effective at reducing loneliness by training people to recognize how their behaviors and thought patterns hinder them from forming the kinds of connections they value […] Another idea is to encourage synchrony. Research shows that one key to how much people like and trust each other lies in how closely their behaviors and reactions match from moment to moment. This synchrony between individuals can be as simple as reciprocating a smile or mirroring body language during conversation.” Excerpt from How Loneliness Reshapes the Brain

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