A woman’s role, to support and obey,
To her man, her lord, in her way.
If she claims to be Christian,
Yet is caught in deception,
Her faith is the price she must pay.
Prompt:
A woman cannot be a church lady if she is “sleeping with the devil”. In the traditional view, a woman’s role is to align herself with her man’s desires. If she’s trying to be Christian but her husband is a demon, her role is to support him because she is hardwired for that purpose. If she puts on a facade of living the Christian life, she is also a devil because she is deceiving anyone who believes her—“No one can serve two masters”. If she kicks the devil out of her bed, another one will replace him—it could be a church conman or a string of wannabe evangelicals after him. But she will never truly become a Christian woman unless her man’s Lord is God.
She is living a lie if she believes she can keep her worldly attachments separate, because her primary purpose is to be a helper to her man. She will always have a supporting role; she can never lead her man, no matter how adamant she is. Women who claim to be pastors in the church are, at worst, charlatans and, at best, confused about their gender roles.
When a nonbeliever woman adopts religion, she often uses it as a psychological tool to influence her partner’s behavior. If her lover takes the bait, he must assume the role of spiritual leader in the home, and she must revert to a supporting role. If she is unable to effect this behavioral change, her newfound faith often falls by the wayside, and she may resort to other manipulation tactics.
Interestingly, in most cases, women feel less compelled to pursue religion if their spouse is wealthy, as financial stability can reduce reliance on spiritual support to meet emotional needs. The only reason religion comes into play is because it becomes a battle of wits between husband and wife, with her leveraging her newfound faith to gain an advantage over her husband’s lack of belief. Psychological research suggests that religion can be used as a means of manipulation or to induce guilt or shame in a partner during interpersonal conflicts. When a woman claims she has found religion, she is either deluded or scheming.
Religion often flows to a woman through a Christian man. A man seeks God to submit to Him; a woman seeks a man to submit to him. Historically, this dynamic has kept religion firmly patriarchal. For a woman, there is only one true path to God: through a Christian man.
A woman is hardwired to trust her husband—her lord—to protect her. If she cannot trust her man, he will never be her lord. She needs to look up to him, just as a man looks up to his God. When she loses faith in her own abilities or feels let down by her partner, she may seek another lord. If none is available, she often turns to religion—making a contract with man-made religion to save herself and her children. Women approach this transaction with the hope that fulfilling their part of the agreement will spare them hardship and allow for peaceful living. For many, turning to religion is the only way they know to cope with their reality. To them, religion serves as a form of meditation—a coping mechanism similar to self-medication.
Regarding why young single women attend church, it is often for socializing and companionship. Conversely, older single women do so because it has become a long-standing ritual. In many cases, authoritative male figures within the church community become their spiritual leaders.
Finally, when a liberated woman claims she can be religious on her own terms, she has fallen for the devil’s lie—there’s no genuine faith in her dark heart. The idea of a truly liberated Christian woman is often considered a lost cause, as most liberal men are perceived as predators and demons.
Edited by: ElRoyPoet, 2025
What does the Bible say about women pastors?
Commentary:
The assertion that a woman cannot be a devout Christian if she is involved with someone deemed morally questionable, often framed as a “demon,” reflects a complex interplay of religious interpretations, traditional gender roles, and psychological assumptions. This perspective argues that a woman’s primary role, especially within a religious context, is to align herself with her partner’s desires and actions. If her partner is perceived as embodying negative or demonic influences, her duty is to support him, often presented as an inherent part of her nature or divinely ordained purpose. This viewpoint frequently emphasizes submission and loyalty to the male figure, regardless of his actions.
Furthermore, the idea that a woman who outwardly presents a Christian lifestyle while secretly engaging in perceived immoral behavior is herself a deceitful “devil” highlights a contrast between outward appearances and inner character. This perspective emphasizes that true faith is inseparable from moral conduct, and any perceived hypocrisy is seen as a severe transgression, potentially negating her entire claim to religious adherence. The principle of “serving only one master” is often invoked, suggesting that a woman cannot truly be committed to God while simultaneously involved in relationships or behaviors deemed incompatible with Christian values. This creates a difficult and potentially damaging dilemma for women who find themselves in such situations.
The argument that replacing one “demon” with another – a church man poser, for example – suggests a cyclical pattern of deception and flawed judgment. This implies that a woman’s attempt to escape one problematic relationship will inevitably lead her into another, highlighting the potential for victim blaming and a lack of agency on the part of the woman. Crucially, this view often fails to acknowledge the complexities of human relationships, the potential for manipulation, and the pressures women might face in such situations, effectively silencing their agency and vulnerabilities. It potentially paints a bleak and unsupportive picture of religious life for women in these circumstances.
“In every encounter, we either give life or we drain it; there is no neutral exchange.” By: Brennan Manning
LDS Church leaders have taught on many occasions that a woman should obey her husband. Some examples from the 1800s include that of Orson Pratt who wrote in 1852 that a woman should not marry a man unless she “had fully resolved herself to submit herself wholly to his counsel, and let him govern as the head”. Additionally, apostles Heber C. Kimball and George A. Smith both taught in the temple in the 1840s that a wife must be “in subjection” to her husband. Young also taught in the temple that Adam only received the tokens of the priesthood after learning to not listen to his wife, and that women won’t get back to God unless they follow a man back. Because these teachings on women were given by top leaders in temple they became unquestioned parts of LDS culture.
Other examples of teachings on LDS women in marriages include church president Harold B. Lee’s 1972 article “Maintain Your Place as a Woman” which stated, “the wife is to obey the law of her husband” (with the caveat “only as he obeys the laws of God”). In contrast, Spencer W. Kimball said that a man “presides” rather than “rules”. Early prophet Brigham Young stated of his wives, “The influence of my women over me is no more than the buzzing of a fly’s wing in winter.” He also stated, “A woman is the dirtiest creature, dirtier than a man”, and “Men are honest, but if a woman won’t lie, she is a miracle.” Excerpt from: Mormonism and women
“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14
The Divine and the Deceptive: Understanding the Role of Women in Christian and Cultural Contexts
The role of women within religious and societal frameworks has long been a subject of debate, interpretation, and sometimes controversy. The assertion that “a woman cannot be a church lady if she is sleeping with the devil” encapsulates a perspective rooted in biblical authority, traditional gender roles, and psychological understanding. We will explore these concepts by examining biblical references, psychological insights, and cultural patterns that support the idea that a woman’s spiritual integrity and societal role are intrinsically linked to her fidelity to biblical principles, particularly within a patriarchal context.
Biblical Foundations of Gender Roles
The Bible presents a clear delineation of gender roles, emphasizing the woman’s role as a helper and supporter to her husband. Genesis 2:18 states, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” This foundational scripture underscores the biblical view that a woman’s primary purpose is to support her man, aligning her desires and actions with his spiritual and physical well-being. Furthermore, Ephesians 5:22-24 admonishes, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord,” reinforcing the idea that a woman’s spiritual and social role is intertwined with her submission to her husband as the head, much like Christ is the head of the church.
The analogy of serving one master is evident in Matthew 6:24: “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other.” Applying this to the context of a woman’s spiritual life, the biblical perspective suggests that a woman’s loyalty must be directed toward God and her husband. If she aligns herself with “the devil”—metaphorically representing evil or disobedience—she cannot genuinely embody the virtues of a Christian woman.
Psychological Perspectives and the Role of Deception
From a psychological standpoint, the concept of living a facade or being deceptive aligns with theories of cognitive dissonance and identity. When a woman claims to live a Christian life while secretly engaging in immoral or rebellious behavior—symbolized here as “sleeping with the devil”—she embodies internal conflict and deception. According to Carl Jung’s ideas on the shadow self, suppressing or denying one’s true impulses leads to a fractured identity and spiritual emptiness. Such a woman, by pretending to be righteous, not only deceives herself but also others, undermining her authenticity and spiritual integrity.
Support for her spiritual journey depends on aligning her actions with her professed beliefs. If she attempts to maintain a facade of holiness while being spiritually compromised, she risks becoming a “devil” herself—deceiving others and straying further from true faith. This aligns with biblical warnings against hypocrisy, such as Matthew 23:27-28, where Jesus condemns the Pharisees for outward appearances without true righteousness within.
The Consequences of Spiritual Disloyalty
The analogy that “if she kicks the devil out of her bed, another one will replace him”—be it a church conman or false evangelicals—illustrates the importance of genuine spiritual commitment. The biblical principle that one cannot serve two masters applies here; superficial religiosity is insufficient. Genuine faith requires a heart committed to God, evidenced through actions and obedience, not merely appearances.
Furthermore, the assertion that a woman’s primary purpose is to support her man and that she cannot lead him resonates with traditional biblical gender roles. Proverbs 31 describes a virtuous woman as a helper, protector, and contributor to her household’s well-being, not as a leader of her husband’s spiritual or worldly affairs. This does not diminish her value but emphasizes her supportive role within the divine order established by Scripture.
Women, Faith, and Cultural Conditioning
Culturally, the flow of religion to women being mediated primarily through men reflects patriarchal structures. Historically, religion has been used to reinforce male dominance, with women seeking spiritual authority through their husbands or male leaders. When women attempt to forge their own spiritual paths outside this framework, biblical and cultural critiques argue that they are falling prey to the “devil’s lie,” seeking independence contrary to divine design.
The mention of women pastors or female religious leaders as “charlatans” or “confused” echoes a traditional perspective that such roles violate biblical gender roles. 1 Timothy 2:12 states, “I do not permit a woman to teach or assume authority over a man,” which some interpret as a divine restriction on female spiritual leadership. While contemporary theological debates challenge this view, within this perspective, women’s spiritual authority must be mediated through male leadership.
Women’s Trust, Stress, and Religious Coping
Psychologically, women’s reliance on religion as a coping mechanism for stress, especially when their trust in their male partner falters, underscores the deep-rooted nature of their reliance on male authority. When a woman cannot trust her man as her spiritual and emotional lord, she may seek other “lords”—be it religion, other men, or manipulative tactics—to find stability and purpose.
This aligns with the idea that women are hardwired to trust and look up to their male counterparts for protection and guidance. If this trust is broken, women may turn to religion as a psychological refuge, a form of self-medication to cope with feelings of betrayal or inadequacy. Such behavior is consistent with Freud’s view of religion as a projection of childhood dependency needs, providing comfort and security in uncertain circumstances.
In conclusion, the assertion that “a woman cannot be a church lady if she is sleeping with the devil” encapsulates a worldview grounded in biblical authority, traditional gender roles, and psychological understanding of human behavior. Scripture emphasizes that women’s primary role is supportive and aligned with their husbands’ spiritual leadership, and any deviation from this path risks spiritual deception and dissonance. From a psychological perspective, living a facade or engaging in deception undermines authentic faith and personal integrity.
Ultimately, genuine spiritual fulfillment for women, within this framework, is achieved through adherence to biblical principles—supporting their men, trusting in divine authority, and avoiding the deception of false appearances. As Proverbs 31:12 affirms, “She will do him good and not harm all the days of her life,” emphasizing that a woman’s true strength and purpose lie in her faithful support of her man and her obedience to God’s divine order.
“To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If a brother has an unbelieving wife and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has an unbelieving husband and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his believing wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let him go. The believing brother or sister is not bound in such cases. God has called you to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?” Excerpt from: 1 Corinthians 7
Counter Point:
The assertion that a woman cannot be a Christian if she is in a relationship with someone deemed “the devil” is a harmful and inaccurate interpretation of both Christian theology and psychological realities. The text presents a dangerous and simplistic view of women, their relationships, and their faith. It conflates complex human dynamics with a rigid, outdated understanding of gender roles and spirituality, ultimately undermining the agency and autonomy of women.
The statement “a woman cannot be a church lady if she is sleeping with the devil” relies on a deeply problematic dualism. It assumes a binary opposition between “Christian” and “unholy,” implying that any deviation from a prescribed moral code automatically equates to spiritual corruption. This simplistic categorization ignores the complexities of human relationships and the spectrum of moral struggles individuals face. Furthermore, it pathologizes women, suggesting that their choices or vulnerabilities inherently compromise their faith. This perspective is not only unsupported by scripture but also profoundly damaging to women’s self-worth and spiritual well-being.
The idea that a woman’s role is to “align herself with her man’s desires” is a misinterpretation of both biblical teachings and psychological understanding. While the Bible emphasizes the importance of mutual respect and submission within marriage (Ephesians 5:22-24), it does not reduce women to passive recipients of their partner’s whims. A healthy relationship is built on mutual respect, communication, and shared values. The concept of “hardwiring” women to support their partners, regardless of their actions, is a harmful stereotype. Psychology demonstrates that healthy relationships are characterized by equality and mutual growth, not subservience. Relationships where one partner is significantly more dominant or controlling can be detrimental to both individuals.
The assertion that a woman who maintains a Christian facade while engaging in a morally questionable relationship is “also a devil” is a dangerous and self-serving condemnation. It assumes that outward conformity to religious practice automatically equates to inner righteousness. This overlooks the reality of human struggles and the inherent complexity of faith. Many individuals, regardless of gender, grapple with internal conflicts and strive to live according to their values while facing personal challenges. This struggle is not a sign of duplicity but a testament to the human condition. The idea that one can’t serve two masters, while seemingly biblical, is often applied in a way that ignores the complexity of human motivations. People can experience internal conflict and still strive for good, even in the face of adversity. The Bible itself contains narratives of figures who experienced moral failings and yet maintained a connection with God.
The fear that kicking “the devil” out of one’s bed will simply result in another replacement, whether it be a fraudulent church man or someone else, is a common human experience. But this fear does not justify the prescribed role for the woman in the initial text. Instead, it highlights the importance of discernment, critical thinking, and seeking support from reliable sources within the Christian community. Authentic faith is not about conforming to external pressures but about cultivating a genuine relationship with God, one that allows for vulnerability and growth.
In conclusion, the original text presents a harmful and inaccurate interpretation of Christian theology and psychological realities. It perpetuates harmful stereotypes about women, devalues their agency, and promotes a dangerous dualistic view of spirituality. A healthy and authentic faith journey is one that embraces complexity, acknowledges the challenges of human relationships, and fosters genuine personal growth and spiritual development. It is not one of prescribed roles and rigid expectations.
Quotes by ElRoyPoet:
“I’m so glad, that I was finally called out as a hypocrite, because keeping up appearances can be so exhausting. Now I have an excuse for bringing down the facade.”
“How can I expect my religion to change you; if it hasn’t fixed my anxiety yet? I guess—deep down in my heart I was hoping—that your faith would be the exception!”
“The devil will remind you over and over again, of your past. Because he knows that the day you stop feeling sorry for yourself, he has no future with you. Holding on to old grudges will not remove the pain in your brain. Only Jesus can transform your life, if you allow him into your heart.”
“It’s the oldest trick of the devil, when he tells you: ‘I can save you too’. Don’t fall for his lies!”
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